Wishful thinking.

Today was perhaps one of the worse days so far this year. Ranked right up there with the daily, "I dont want to go to work." day and the "Could things get any worse" day.

"Today would be a good day for all the stupid people in the world to spontaneously combust. With my luck, however, I would be the first one to burst into flames, and the rest of you poor sods would be out of a job."

I had to go into deep stupid mode today to explain the distinct difference between a modem, a router, an ethernet cable, and a usb cable and where each one of them plug in. Honestly, when I use terms such as "The ethernet cable has a large phone like plug on one end, with a cable color that is usually grey, but can be blue, black, yellow, while and even green." I usually expect the person I am speaking to to understand that 'Oh, this cable is the ethernet cable.' Guess what, this gal just didnt get it. Then I explained the finer difference between her modem, the box with 5 lights, three cables in the back and is clearly marked RCA. she kept farting around with her d-link router. At this time, I was close to giving up when she had a sudden flash of insight and she realized that she was monkeying around with her stuff and plugged it all back in wrong. Problem solved right? wrong. she then demanded credit for the fact that she was without service for 2 days, and she had to wait 1 hour to talk to someone. I happily told her that I could not give credit to her services because everything was working according to our tools and it was not our fault that things were not reconnected right.

Hope you bring marshmallows and chocolate and graham crackers.

following instructions.

Greetings fellow smart, intelligent, yet sometimes retarded friends.

I would like to take a moment of your time to go back in time to grade school.
What would have happened to you if a teacher had asked you to do the following:

1. Put away your current project.
2. Take out your crayons.
3. Read the instructions on the paper and color the picture according to those instructions.
4. Put away your crayons when you are finished.
5. Bring your completed assignment to me to be graded.

And you decided to skip Step 1, 3, and 4 and just colored the picture and turned it in? Would you have received a good grade?

Step-by-step instructions are a fact of life. They govern how we live in this society, so why is it that we forgot this basic fact? Is it due to the 'I think I know what I am doing when I dont' syndrome, where we cannot follow even the simplest instructions even when we are told step-by-step what to do?

I can understand that you are frustrated, and that you have 'tried' everything to get your service to work again, but there are several great reasons why we ask you do to it again.

1. You cant follow instructions. You need to have your hand held each time you call for support cause you dont care enough about your services, but you sure care that you are spending $XXX dollars on it.
2. You cant tell a router from a modem from Immodeum. Here is a hint, you have more than 1 device that connects to the internet? two or more computers? computer and xbox/ps3? Have bubble guts?
3. 99/100 times, you forgot to unplug/plug something in the right order, and it needs to be done by 'professionals' even though you are the one actually unplugging/plugging the device.

Ladies, Gentlemen, and college students,

Here is $200 (fake) buy a clue.